Stay and Play

From: Denise
To: Me

Hi Kimberly,

I am interested in joining you on Friday for the play date, however I am not sure if I will be able to make it this Friday.

In the future if you continue to do these kinds of events I would love to join you all so if you would not mind keeping me in the loop that would be great. I have a son who will be 2 in a few weeks and I love doing play dates with others! 

Thanks so much for offering this!

Love,
Denise

From: Me

To: Denise

Hi Denise,
Whenever you can come is fine - there will always be space for your son.  Our Stay and Play events are similar to the Hotel California in that you can check in any time you like, but you can never leave.  I hope I mentioned that the last time we talked since that seems to catch some parents off guard. 

The perks of a 24/7 lifetime-long play groups are numerous.  You never have to worry about your child being bored at home since we currently have 50 children between the ages of 6mo and 12 years in the building.  Once a child turns 13, we send them to a separate facility in a 3rd world country where they stay until they are 17 and learn to appreciate nice things.  At 17, they return to our U.S. facility and begin working as staff and caretakers.  Our curriculum is light on the 3 Rs, but heavy on manual labor and street smarts.  Some of our staff who are not suited for childcare are sent out as panhandlers to keep this operation running, so that's where the street smarts training really pays off (as you can imagine)! 

Hope to see you soon!
Kimberly

p.s. I have a strong suspicion that you intended to send this message to a different Kimberly Henderson.  And before you call the cops on me, I'm kidding.  I swear I'm kidding.